Monday, February 16, 2009

Changes On The Homefront

I have turned in my two week notice at Pine Summit. I have missed many Wednesday's since the Christmas Holiday's due to sickness, knee surgery, tooth thing after another. I have struggled with this decision for several months, when we were first forced out of our home because of black mold, but I stayed. I stayed for a couple of reasons, one..I absolutely LOVE the people at Pine Summit Baptist Church. The first day I was there I was welcomed with open arms. They embraced me during the mold days, loved on me and my family and prayed for us. I feel a sort of dedication to them...that's different than obligation. Another reason though, that I put of resigning is because of fear. I know, I know, I can't have fear and reflect a faithful life...for where there is fear, there is no faith. My fear has been lead by money. We live on a very tight budget. We struggle just like the next person does, I'm sure, but we seem to just never get a break. My working one day a week brought home $138 which paid for groceries. I learned how to shop on a budget, shop on sale and clip coupons after I quit working after two back to back pregnancies several years ago. Our income was cut more than half because at the time, I was the Kitchen Coordinator at Olive Baptist. I was responsible for all the spending... accounts, paper goods, food purchases, scheduling and staff of seven at the time. We took a huge cut, but it was one we felt was important. I wanted and needed to be home with two small babies. When I was approached about the position at Pine Summit it was a huge answer to prayer and the scheduling was perfect as Chris was off on Wednesday's and could manage the kids while I worked. This routine has worked well for over a year and half. With Kayla's homeschooling requiring more of my time, her volunteering in the Social Ministries at Olive on Monday's, and the all around craziness of my life, a son who is not responding well to medications for ADHD/OCD and a precious little girl that gets left out a lot, and me personally struggling with my depression and continued weight gain, I feel I need to be home. Chris has been supportive of me working, but told me months ago when things started piling up on me that he would be OK if I decided to stay home. Again...fear crept will we make ends meet? What else can I cut out that we haven't already cut out....well, I;m sure I will come up with a few things, trust me! In all my years as a single mother, I saw the Lord's hand over mine and Kayla's life over and over and over. The Lord has continued His faithfulness, even when I was faithless...especially when I was faithless. So, with that, I am stepping out in faith, to try and make myself well, and to take care of the home front.

Schooling is calling and papers are mounting. Until next time...

2 Timothy 2:13 "if we are faithless, he will remain faithful....."

No comments: