Let Me See Redemption Win . . . .

I am the mother of two special needs children. 

One boy with Asperger's, mild Tourettes, OCD, Anxiety, Sensory, and Insomnia that is 8 years old. My daughter is 7 and suffers with Sensory and a severe anxiety disorder. 

I praise God for good days, and I am learning to praise God for the oh so bad days. 

This past Saturday my son had a melt down at his cousin's birthday party. His meds were wearing off (which is always an emotional time daily) and then his feelings were hurt that we had to leave the party early . . . . ended in him punching me over and over to get away and then running down the street. 

These sort of days don't happen every day any more, but when they do, it is taxing. 

When Christopher was just days old, God gave us a pediatrician that is so much more than a pediatrician. 

She is a friend. 

An advocate. 

A shoulder to cry to.

She sent me this song song this morning when she should have been sleeping! I wanted to share it for any of you that are worn. Weary. Tired.

There is hope my friend.

His name is Jesus. When we are at our weakest, His strength then shines through. Why? Because we are out of the way! That's why I think so much changes in the night time hours! When we are sleeping our "selves" are out of the way and He works miracles!

My daughter this morning asked me to take a battery out of the clock. I asked, "why?" She responded, "Because I want to control it."

Oi. What a teachable moment God gave me.

"Kaitlyn, you know there are going to be many times in life that we can not control what is happening." I said.

The conversation continued and while it was more than she could comprehend, it was a start.

I pray you are strengthened this day and that you take the time to seek His face.

Shalom.

He Knows My Name . . .

First of all, I have taken off the music player on my blog.  I post too much music on here to have it playing; so it's off. 

Have had a strange week . .  struggled with anger, jealously, envy, anger (yes, that is on here twice for a reason), bad attitude . .  fear, anxiety . . . . . its all been here. 

Through it all, what keeps coming to my mind and the only thing giving comfort to my heart is knowing, "He Knows My Name." 

He knows every hair on my head (Luke 12:7). 

He knew me before the womb (Psalm 139).

He knows my thoughts before I even speak them (Psalm 139).

He knows . . .  it all!

I've been praying all week and preparing for sharing my testimony on Sunday at Nothing Lost Outreach.  While my heart seems to be at peace,  my mind is a fog.  Scriptures are racing and my thoughts are jumping from one to another . . .

My prayer, as well as many others for me this week, have been that I would speak only the words the Lord would have me to speak and that He alone would be glorified!

I have only lost one pound the last two weigh ins.  Really struggling with commitment.  While even one pound loss in nothing gained, it just seems like it should be more.  I have incorporated exercising more; not the six days a week like my doctor would like, but working up towards that.  I was able to put on my grandmother's wedding band that she gave to Chris to propose with.  I haven't been able to wear it in two years.  It is still tighter than I like my rings to be, but getting close, and that excites me!  Just a few more pounds and I'll be at the halfway mark!

On a side note, I sure am missing my Kayla. She is visiting her boyfriend's family in Georgia this weekend. Please pray for her. She will be home on Monday and then has class Monday night.  I know she is 19; but she is still my baby (I know, I'm a sap).  She is struggling with College Chemistry right now and College Algebra.  She has to have majors in both of these fields if she wants to major in Meteorology. 

Christopher has had a horrible cough and green for one week now.  When Christopher doesn't feel good, it makes everything else worse; his emotions, the melt downs, the anger . . . . just exhausting.  BUT, as a sweet friend reminded me, God chose us to raise this special, special young boy!  I can't wait to see what God does through his life!

Kaitlyn has been chewing the skin off the tips of her fingers and thumbs.  The speculation is the Ritalin she was started on for the ADHD has increased her anxiety and heightened her sensory issues; which would explain the fight we are having with tags, clothing, shoes and socks again.  She is constantly digging on her finger nails and toe nails as well.  She stays nervous, not knowing when Christopher will react next.  Breaks my heart.

Thanks for stopping by today.  I have to get off here so I can finish my scripture references. 

Continuing, to Walk in Victory,

Stacey

Psalm 139:13