Small Potatoes!

Yesterday when I read my Jesus Calling devotional, I read one of yesterday's scriptures and the other ones were for today's.  Of course, I didn't notice that until this morning.

I did noticed they didn't seem to go directly hand in hand like they usually do, but nonetheless they spoke volumes. 

Today, as I am writing out the scriptures in my journal, I thought, "OK Lord, you MUST really be trying to tell me something . . . didn't we just do this one?"  After checking, I noticed the error. 

I re-wrote the scriptures that were meant for today and THEN was prompted by the Holy Spirit to read and write out yesterday's scriptures . . . . .

SO appropriate for a woman that was filled with anxiety and worrisome thoughts until the wee hours of the morning!

Philippians 4:19, "And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus."

Philippians 4: 6- 7, "Do not worry about anything, but in everything through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses every thought, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Today's scriptures that was read yesterday and today . . . . . (I read  this is many translations, but then read it in the message . . . . loved the way it was put!)

2 Corinthians 4: 16 - 18,  "So we're not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There's far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can't see now will last forever."

ISN'T THAT JUST GOOD YA'LL!?!

Habakkuk 3:19, "Yahweh my Lord is my strength; He makes my feet like those of a deer and enables me to walk on mountain heights."

Not sure what you are struggling with today, whether it's worrisome thoughts, or tired and weary, but I pray you will be filled with a peace given only by the Father.

Give me feet like a deer, Lord, as you take me to  new heights!  Amen!

Be Like . . . A Deer?!

On May 23rd, more than just a weight loss/health change began occurring in my life; a heart change began; in fact, I consider it a radical heart change.  Some of what I am about to share some will consider “freaky” or “taking religion to far”  and that’s OK, cause if that’s how you feel, then you need to know my prayer is that you will know Jesus in a radical, life changing way.

Several months ago, even before May 23rd, something kept coming to mind that what is going on with Christopher (the violence and physical rage) was a demonic attack.  The closer my walk with the Lord got, the worse the attacks came, the more I suspected it. 

One particular morning Christopher became so violent I locked up the knives, grabbed the oil and started anointing the house with oil.  It wasn’t me doing it, it was as if the Holy Spirit was moving and guiding me physically and bringing to mind scriptures from “far back” in the memory bank.  My actions were confirmed by a phone call from a woman whom I love and adore.  I have called and shared things with her over the years, but try not to bother her “too much” as I know her life is busy.  She began by telling me she felt she had no right to even ask . . . she was apologizing before she even started, so I said, “it’s OK, just say it.”  She then said, “I sense God has been telling me for over a year what is going on with the violence in Christopher is demonic.”  She breathed a sense of relief when I confirmed what the Lord has shown and done that very morning.  While speaking to her and her encouraging me to “rally the troops,”, the Lord clearly told me to anoint my home with oil for seven days.  I followed in obedience marking every door frame, every window I could reach, the walls over my children’s bed and while they were sleeping anointed their body’s with oil.  Miracles began happening.  Did the autism go away, no.  Do the melt downs still occur, sure they do; but the violence has dwindled tremendously. 

I gave you that back ground so you would see the closeness I have been experiencing with my Father in Heaven.  He began showing me ways He had changed my heart in areas I thought would NEVER change and in areas I didn’t want to change!  I have always wanted money.  My plan for my life was to be rich and powerful.  Even after giving my life to the Lord on October 19, 1998, that desire NEVER went away.  I wanted money, BIG houses, expensive cars and that was my goal in life.  I thought I could keep that secret desire always and that was my prayer for years.  As our poverty level has lessoned more and more, that desire began to set the root of bitterness and jealousy in.  I began getting angry and resentful to God and my husband and anyone else that had what I wanted.  Over and over I begged God to give me a way out.  But He never did. 

On July 29th I experienced freedom from that bitter rage of greed; then I voiced it to my friend and mentor that has been helping me with my physical and spiritual health.  The words I wrote in my journal on that day and spoke verbally through heart ache and tears were, “Lord, I pray you will always keep my anchor line taught – and if that means being poor the rest of my life, so be it.  Never let me forget.” 

I should have known satan would rear his ugly head after making such a bold statement.  In the days since that, our food stamps have been suspended, our cash assistance application was lost, and Medicaid for me and Chris have been cancelled; that means no surgery for my shoulder.  When the hospital called me to tell me I had no insurance, I freaked.  I had insurance coverage one day, and the next day it was gone with no explanation.  I was already emotional that we had to dip into our mortgage payment monies to pay this months bills and after next month, there is no more.   I went into complete panic mode to the point I couldn’t breathe.  My mentor and friend helped talk me through, reminding me what I already knew and know.  She encouraged me to begin praying for the person I speak to on Monday regarding our case.  I have documented names and information given in case I have to file a fair hearing.  Regardless of the outcome, this morning, I am OK.  I told the Lord I would sell everything, and go wherever He wants us to go.  How can I pray that and not mean it, and then doubt His plan for me?  The two just don’t go together.
When I went to bed last night my mind was focusing on praying in order to keep the fear from creeping back in. 

THEN, this morning, God gave me the most encouraging word in my Jesus Calling book.  It reads:

WHEN THINGS SEEM to be going all wrong, stop and affirm your trust in Me.  Calmly bring these matters to Me, and leave them in My capable hands.  Then, simply do the next thing.  Stay in touch with Me through thankful, trusting prayers, resting in My sovereign control.  Rejoice in Me –exult in the God of your salvation!  As you trust in Me, I make your feet like the feet of a deer.  I enable you to walk and make progress upon your high places of trouble, suffering or responsibility.

Scripture References:

Job 13:15,   “Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him; I will surely defend my ways to his face.”

Psalm 18:33, “He makes my feet like a deer, he enables me to stand on the heights.”

Habakkuk 3:17 – 19, “Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in my God and my Savior!  The sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like a deer, he enables me to go on to new heights!

OH MY GOSH!  Did you read that!  Did you see how the Lord just confirmed to me how much He loves me and my family! 

With all the references to deer feet, I got to wondering how they walk, and what it is about them that I need to be like!  Here is what I found out:

~Deer have their eyes on the sides of their head, giving them a 310 degree view. This wide view does make it hard for deer to focus on a single point. Deer have a good night vision, which is useful in the early morning and near dusk.

~Deer have an excellent sense of smell, which allows them to detect predators from a long distance away. Deer lick their nose to keep it moist, which helps odor particles stick to it, improving their sense of smell. The nose also plays a role in communication.

~When a deer is confronted with danger it has two choices, to run or to hold tight. Deer can run for short distances in excess of 40 miles per hour or 20 miles per hour for 3 miles or so. They can also clear an 8 foot fence and broad jump a 25 foot wide stream. BUT, a deer can also hold tight and let danger pass right by them. Most hunters do not realize how often they walk right by a deer during the course of a season and never see it. When the hunting pressure is on a buck, he will let the hunter pass within a few feet.

~A female deer can place her hind (back) feet exactly where her front feet stepped, not one inch off! She is able to run with abandonment! In times of danger and protecting her young, she is able to run securely, and not get "off track".

I found much more information, but these facts stood out to me significantly.

~I need to be on guard 24/7 being ready to defend my faith.  While I don’t have eyes that give me a 310 degree view, I do know the best way to face battle is on my knees. 

~I must remember to listen to that “gut instinct” (that’s in reference to the deer ability to smell).  That gut instinct is usually the Holy Spirit . . . gotta listen.

~When tempted with ways that are not God’s ways, I need to flee . . . RUN as fast as I can and away from that situation.  BUT, when satan is bearing down on me and my family, the best thing I can do is “hold tight!”  Stay on my knees, claim the scriptures, and “danger” (satan) will flee.  Doesn’t mean he won’t be back, but it does prepare us for future battles.

~I need to watch my steps.  I need to walk gently, and securely in the Holy Spirit, letting Him guide my every step.  Hinds site (back feet to front feet position) is 20/20 . . . may my fore site be as wise as my hind site!

Sorry this was such a long read.  I was just so excited about what the Lord showed me this morning.  While my circumstances have not changed, my heart has, AND THAT my friend, makes life OK.

Continuing to Walk in Victory,

Stacey

Jesus Calling, August 4th Devotional

My morning was horrible, filled with anger, anxiety and lots of tears.  Emotions were running high as I was focusing on the world’s standards and not the Lords.

For some, living out their faith comes easy, but for me, living out my faith is a daily choice, just like choosing to not drink when life gets “too hard.”  I don’t ever want to take my walk with the Lord for granted, so I am thankful He keeps me on a short leash, so to speak!
 
I have been reading Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young, for several months now.
 
My mornings starts with my cup of java and my .20 spiral notebook.  When I started journaling again (on May 23rd), the Lord impressed it upon my heart to journal first thing, then to read my morning devotionals and scriptures.  Never thought anything about it until my heart started changing.  When I first started journaling again it was because I was told I had to.  Ticked me off quite frankly cause I did not want to.  I could put on face and pretend life was grand to others, but you can only lie to yourself for so long. . . . anyway, that was a rabbit being chased, sorry. . . back to journaling.  It dawned on me a few weeks back that my journaling pages were growing longer and longer (anything could be longer from day one. . . trust me, it wasn’t pretty, but it was real).  Then, the Lord started revealing Himself to me even more. . . . the very pages on my journal, the tablet of my heart, were being confirmed and loved on in the words of this book!  I said, (and I have goosebumps as I type and reflect on this!), “OH MY GOSH, HOW DID YOU DO THAT, LORD?!” 

Every single day, before I write, I ask the Lord to bring to mind the things I need to write about, to pray out.  He blows my mind.  Tears flood my eyes as I think of His mightiness, that He loves me SO much . . . so much it simply can not be put into words.  He loves you that much also . . . it’s simply indescribable. 

Yesterday’s devotional was on “holding your tongue.”  Definitely needed that one.  When I get my “feelings” hurt I instantly put up a wall and say hurtful things.  He amazingly clamped my lips shut and has helped me to process the hurt.  It was rather cool.

TODAYS devotional though, was overwhelming.

This is what it reads:

HOLD MY HAND, and walk joyously with Me through this day.  Together we will savor the pleasures and endure the difficulties it brings(this was for me).  Be on the lookout for everything I have prepared for you:  stunning scenery, bracing winds of adventure, cozy nooks for resting when you are weary, and much more.  I am your Guide, as well as your constant Companion.  I know every step of the journey ahead of you(and this. . .), all the way to heaven.

You don’t have to choose between staying close to Me and staying on course.  Since I am the Way, staying close to Me IS staying on course.  As you focus your thoughts on Me, I will guide you carefully along today’s journey.  Don’t worry about what is around the next bend (this was specifically for me).  Just concentrate on enjoying My Presence and staying in step with Me.

The scripture references were:

John 14:6, Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life.  No one comes to the Father except through me.

Colossians 4:2, “Devote yourselves in prayer, being watchful and thankful.

Now I can’t sit here and tell you the tears went away instantly.  In fact, I cried all morning and into the afternoon.  What I can tell you is, is that MY GOD is on EVERY step of THIS JOURNEY with ME!  He has NEVER left me.  HE NEVER WILL.  When I don’t understand, I have to have faith . . . because in that moment my faith is being strengthened. 

The Lord has recently given me an answer to my many “Why’s” in life.  (You know, we all ask that question from time to time, and if we listen after asking, He might just answer.)  What the Lord began telling me personally after asking “Why Lord?” was one word, “comfort.”  So I know, that whether I like a situation, whether it’s my fault or not, regardless. . . . I now tell myself, “someone is going to need comforting in this area and you are purifying me through this process Lord.  I need your help to see it through.” 

If I can be a comfort to someone else, or help encourage along the way, or share my story of hope and restoration in what HE has done in my life and my family’s life, then it is worth it; and for that, I’m OK.

Continuing to Walk in Victory,

Stacey

Why Are You So Mean?!

Mid to late afternoon's are my body's "munch" time.  I snack and snack.  In the past, those snacks have been snicker bars, potato chips, ICE CREAM . . . you get the drift.  I've replaced those snack time indulgences with more healthy options such as grapes, apples, fruit smoothies, in order to get my through to dinner. 

**You'll have to mute the music player below to hear the song posted below.**

A few days ago, Kaitlyn looked at me and started singing the chorus to Taylor Swift's song, Mean. (Kaityln, and Kayla for that, are huge Taylor Swift fans.)  I said, "Why are you singing that to me?"  She said, "Cause you are being MEAN!"  I laughed at the moment, in fact, chimed in with her, until this morning.

My journal entry for this morning was this, "The last three or four days I have been snippy in the afternoons when my normal snacky munchie time sets in - anxiousness sets in as my body craves to eat - doesn't matter what it is - junk food or healthy - I just crave the gorging full "feeling."  It's just as wrong for me to gorge on healthy as it is to gorge on junk, not health wise, but heart wise.  See, the point is I have to get past the necessity of  gorging or I will just replace this food addiction with another as I did with the alcohol almost 13 years ago.  As I mentioned before, these spouts have been going on for the last three or four days; so today, I am putting it before the Lord, so He will quicken my spirit and give me, show me, a way out."

Then, I read today's devotion from "Jesus Calling."  It was so good and it amazed me how it was referring to exactly what I had journaled!

Jesus Calling

LET ME HELP YOU get through this day. There are many possible paths to travel between your getting up in the morning and your lying down at night.  Stay alert tot he many choice-points along the way, being continually aware of My Presence.  You will get through this day one way or the other.  One way is to moan and groan, stumbling along with shuffling feet.  This will get you to the end of the day, eventually, but there is a better way.  You can choose to walk with Me along the path of Peace, leaning on Me as much as you need.  There will still be difficulties along the way, but you can face them confidently in My strength.  Thank Me for each problem you encounter, and watch to see how I transform trials into blessings.

The scriptures given to study are:

I Corinthians 10:10, "And do not grumble as some of them did - and were killed by the destroying angel."

Luke 1:79, "to shine on those living in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the path of peace."

Was that confirmation, or what??!!  Today my goal is to take my thoughts captive before they come out of my mouth! 

Father I pray my victory at day's end is that my children will be able to see a difference in me regarding my attitude.  Believing it to be so!  Amen!